Who has the religious and legal right to name an infant: the mother, father, or ...
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Question
Who has the religious and legal right to name an infant: the mother, father, or someone else? Even if the wife really wants a specific name and SHE is the one who carried for 9 months and SHE is the one who will go through the pains of delivery while the husband does nothing of the sort, can his choice override the mother's choice for her child's name?
Answer
Dear Sister,
I pray this message finds you and your family well.
From the ahadith of the Prophet, peace be upon him, one understands that it is the duty of the parents to give the child a good and respectable name. In answer to your question, it was pointed out to me that the father has the ultimate say in naming the child based on his role as amir of the family.
To prevent bad feelings, you and your husband might settle on a compromise. Perhaps you can both decide on a name that is mutually pleasing. Or you could pick your husband's choice as the child's first name, and give him your choice as a middle name, or vice versa. Maybe you can take turns, that is, your first child get's the name Dad wants, the second gets Mom's choice, etc.
Ultimately, the father is the amir of the family, but a good amir is the one who decides through mutual consultation. It is possible for you to recognize your husband's role as the amir, while at the same time, making your own wishes clear.
Narrated 'Abdullah bin 'Umar:
Allah's Apostle said, "Surely! Everyone of you is a guardian and is responsible for his charges: The Imam (ruler) of the people is a guardian and is responsible for his subjects; a man is the guardian of his family (household) and is responsible for his subjects; a woman is the guardian of her husband's home and of his children and is responsible for them; and the slave of a man is a guardian of his master's property and is responsible for it. Surely, everyone of you is a guardian and responsible for his charges."
[Bukhari, Volume 9, Book 89, Number 252]
Allah Most High speaks of mutual consultation, or shura, as one of the qualities of the believers, "And those who answer the call of their Lord and establish worship, and whose affairs are a matter of counsel, and who spend of what We have bestowed on them." [As-Shura, 42:38]
I pray that Allah gives you a solution through mutual consultation that is beneficial to all.
And Allah knows best.
This answer was published by SunniPath and is preserved as written. Rulings can depend on circumstances; for your own situation, consult a qualified scholar.
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