Marriage Khutba

Marriage Khutba

All praise is to Allah, who has made marriage a mercy and rest, and for the traveler on the path of the next life one of the shortest of ways to the good pleasure of Allah. And blessings and peace upon our leader and master, the Prophet Muhammad, who taught people all good, and upon his family, companions, and those who followed in their footsteps with excellence until the final day.

To proceed:

Allah has honored us to gather in order to fulfill a tremendous sunna from the sunnas of the Prophet (Allah bless him & give him peace), a matter that pleases Allah and that He loves, namely an Islamic marriage.

Allah Most High says, “From His signs is this: He created for you companions from yourselves that you might find rest in them, and He ordained between love and mercy, in this indeed are signs for those who reflect.” (Qur’an, 30: 21)

And our beloved Prophet (Allah bless him & give him peace) said, “O young men! Whoever of you is able to should marry, for it helps one lower one’s gaze and control one’s desires.”

Marriage is a tremendous means of learning for the Muslim who is serious about his next life, because after having lived single for a period of time, he is now with a loving companion. Thus, he is able to learn how to be a good companion, excellent in his dealings, merciful to his spouse, to be as the Prophet (Allah bless him & give him peace) said, “The best of you is the best to their spouses, and I am the best of you to their spouses.”

Marriage is a coming together of two individuals. For it to be successful and fruitful, it is necessary that both spouses have humility, and always maintain a good opinion of their spouse, with patience for that which the other may sometimes do. They should always look at the good traits of the other, and overlook mistakes. We should remember the words of the Prophet (Allah bless him & give him peace) that, “Do not detest your spouse. If you dislike some traits, you will like others.” So whoever has a clear heart and a clean inward always looks at the good points and positive traits of their spouse, and encourages that they get refined, and strengthened.

As for mistakes and shortcomings, one should generally overlook them. If one responds to them, it should be with gentleness, easygoingness, and kind counsel (nasiha). As it is said, “Nine tenths of good companionship is overlooking.” It does not need to be said that this does not apply to that which is wrong or impermissible in the Shariah, we are obliged to correct such matters in the best of ways.

The husband should always keep in mind when he looks towards his wife that the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) is standing behind her, for he (Allah bless him & give him peace) is her (spiritual) father, and guardian. And did he (Allah bless him & give him peace) not say, “Take good care of your women. Take good care of your women. Take good care of your women.” And he also said, “Only an honorable man honors them, and only a base man abases them.” With this in mind, the husband’s heart should always be full of mercy, love, and kindness towards his wife.

The wife should always keep in mind the tremendous rights she owes her husband, who is her amir and guardian. She should be thankful for everything he does for her, and should create a warm and welcoming atmosphere at home for her husband.

So the husband should look towards his wife with love and affection, and deal with her with care and guard her best interests. And the wife should look towards her husband with reverence and respect, and deal with him with honoring, serving, and ensuring his peace of mind. Both should remember that their spouse is a door to Paradise and the good pleasure of Allah Most High.

Finally, both spouses should know and keep in mind that the key to felicity in their married life is that they should always make the Noble Shariah their criterion and adjudicator in all their motions and rest. If they ever differ or disagree on a matter, the Shariah should be the resort to resolve the matter. This way, they can ensure happiness in this life and felicity in the next life.

We say to our dear brother Mahbub al-Rahman that which the Prophet (Allah bless him & give him peace) used to say,

  Baraka Allahu laka, wa baraka `alayk, a jama`a baynakuma fi khayr.

 ‘May Allah bless you, and her, and bring you together in all that is good.’

May Allah accept from us and you, and bless all of us in our family and offspring. And those who don’t (yet) have families, O Allah, grant them and honor them.

And we send peace and blessings upon our master Muhammad (Allah bless him & give him peace), his family and companions, and close by praising Allah Most High.

- Iyad al-Ghawj, Amman, Jordan.