Sufis' Marital Duties
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Question
What is Sufism? Does Sufism teach a married to think and love for Allah only? How about his wife and family - in terms of his affections (love) and duties to his wife and family? Should he neglect them? I was quoted "Your first love must be for Allah". Where does a wife stands? Didn't Allah made marriage for a man and woman? Where does Sufism stands in the relationship of a husband and wife? I am in need of help here.Answer
Wa `alaykum as-Salam
The idea that a married Sufi should neglect duties to wife and family is not from Islam in the least and is a gross error. On the contrary, a Sufi spouse is more strictly bound to love and respect his dependents, and observe fully the rights he owes them, as should in fact any Muslim according to the Shari`a, but even more so if one claims a connection to the paths of self-purification and perfecting of the soul.
As for the saying that one's first love should be for Allah, it never cancels out but rather goes together with the saying of the Prophet, upon him peace: "The best of you are those that treat their spouses best, and I treat my spouses best." In fact it is for the sake of Allah that we should be even more careful, as Sufis, to love and treat dearly those among all humanity He places in our care, beginning with dependents.
Hajj Gibril
This answer was published by SunniPath and is preserved as written. Rulings can depend on circumstances; for your own situation, consult a qualified scholar.
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